Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
