I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
