he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
