why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I love you.
Bad choice
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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