We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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