My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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