Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
