Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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