I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
