tell your sister to shave her snatch
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
