words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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