Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
She even gives head with a lisp.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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