Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
