would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
