Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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