Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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