After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize