party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
