seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
