Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Randomize
