Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
