piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize