when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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