neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
