Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Randomize