whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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