I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
