At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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