Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize