I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
