she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
