I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
My dad is sitting where you rode me
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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