We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
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