me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize