i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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