did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
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