Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Randomize
