I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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