So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Randomize
