did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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