thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize