My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize