so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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