Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
