Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize