She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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