i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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