I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
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