hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
being pregnant is like rehab
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
