They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
